Meet My Dad

August 13, 2006

Welcome to my blog. My name’s Casey, and this is my blog. In the next few posts I hope to describe my family.

Dad

My dad is great, don’t get me wrong. But if I just said he was great and moved onto the next person no one would be reading this blog. He was raised with three sisters in Silver Creek NY (which is by the way the most isolated place on the planet).

 The Sisters Three

First off, there’s my Aunt Carol (aka Auntie June). She’s not the most present minded person you’ll ever meet. Here are some Carol Quotes, or as I like to call them, Cuotes. Oh man am I good! Edit – There was only one quote good enough for this blog:

“If Malawi is in Africa, Where is Africa in Europe?”

Next up, Aunt Fran. Aunt Fran is quite honestly the nicest person you’ll ever meet in your life. She’s never mad and she’s never been mad. She literally poops happiness and splendor, and you’ll be hard pressed to find anyone who doesn’t like her. Not much to mention here, except that I found out(after some tough investigative work, like 5 minutes at least) she has, at some point in time, said a bad word. Do do do de do Inspector Casey…

And finally…Aunt Joanne. Aunt Joanne is funny (and nasty dirty) as all get up (as they like to say in my hood). She likes to drink and party, and I wouldn’t be real surprised if she’s made an appearance on Girls Gone Wild recently. I’m just saying…

 As far as towns go, god must’ve greated Silver Creek NY somewhere around the 15th day, and it was not good. The Creek consists of a road and a McDonald’s (with the added bonus of a brand new chinese restaurant) and recieves a combined average snowfall of around 100 billion inches. Anyone raised in the creek knows a few essential things by age 3:

  1. The precise mileage to every location on earth.
  2. How to change a spare tire with your eyes closed.
  3. How to properly pronounce the phrases “Yup”, “Dontcha know it”, and “Well there ya go now”.

Under these circumstances, I’m sure you can understand how ridiculously normal my father is.

My dad is relatively laid back His father was a carpenter, and his mother can cook, he’s a perfect mix of the two. I’ve made a diagram that makes this easier to see:

 

See, a perfect mix! My dad’s in Tech Support. After 20 years in working with computers, he’s learned a lot. Like how to say cool acronyms like “AJAX” and “SAP” (that’s my dad *jealous*). Ok so he’s learned one thing. Shut up.

Brrrr

 Besides the traits listed on the diagram, my father (having grown up in the snowfall capital of the solar system), can shovel like a russian, navigate a road covered in african-american ice, and make a first class snowman in no time. Although he is quite efficient at shoveling, he’s also an Icy Rainman. He can’t come inside before he’s double-shoveled the portions you already triple-shoveled, and has made up his game plan for the upcoming day’s shoveling.

They’re not real

Around 2 years ago I introduced my Dad to a game called Managerzone.. Basically you manage a soccer team. I’d been playing for a while, and figured it might be a nice father-son activity. Here’s how the conversation went:

Casey: “Hey Dad, wanna sign up for ManagerZone? It’s really cool.”

Dad: “Rassum frassum..errrr..too much work…errrr…not enough free time already…errrrrrr..too stressed….errr..no..bad idea.”

He suqsequently started an Excel spreadsheet to manage his team, started depositing $20 a month into his account, and now spends 50 hours a week trying to get that shinytastic .gif trophy (that rotates around 45 degrees and then swivels back just a touch) on his home page. That’s my dad. Deal with it.

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2 Responses to “Meet My Dad”

  1. Mr WordPress Says:

    Hi, this is a comment.
    To delete a comment, just log in, and view the posts’ comments, there you will have the option to edit or delete them.

  2. Jenlene Says:

    Dear Casey-
    This is a lovely blog although we do NOT have a McDonald’s in SC. We only have a Burger King which technically is not in SC, it is in Irving.
    You are awesome.


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